cried
I am physically drained even before camp. Feeling all tired and weary. I wanted to have a good night's sleep. But i chose not to. I cried.
posted @ 3:04 PM
Truth is...
Before you ask about how truthful i am to you, how truthful are you to me?
posted @ 9:42 AM
Lives of people
I guessed i was soooo bored that i could read up to 20 over blogs per day. Knowing people's lives didn't get me going. unless we're related. otherwise, i'm just looking at a stranger's blog. Whoever is she/he tt is witty, pretty, amiable ya da ya da...
But i guessed what got me thinking was their lives too. lol. How they got emotionally tensed up and all. Tried thinking solutions for them sometimes. But there's always times when you are stuck. Like you feel you're in the situation yourself but not being able to do anything to help solve it. Totally crappy. We create problems for ourselves. Tons of problems. Sad thing bout humans.
On a lighter note, I have been sleeping like a dead pig over these 2 days. and unfortunately, it only got me MORE tired. u know? EAT SLEEP SHIT EAT SLEEP SHIT. SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP. unfortunately again, one night it got me worrying to fall asleep becoz i had a nightmare earlier on during my afternoon nap. I think in my dreams. What say you? What a problematic person I am. Worry so much for waddd...only know how to kill myself.
Whoever lives with me suffers? hahaha. Judge for yourself. I'm a killer. Anw, dun mind if i sound weird. Symptoms of depression and going bonkers have been invading me. Needa get medication soon...YOWWWWS!
posted @ 11:31 AM
blogs
BLOGS ARE
SOMEWHAT CONTROLLED. SHHHHH.
posted @ 7:30 AM
fooooodddddd
Given tt i ate 1 pineapple tart, 4 cheese biscuits, 3 10g of dark chocolates, curry maggi mee, my home-made (tadaaa!) banana split today, and it's now nearing evening...I AM HUNGRYYYY. whole family enjoying in m'sia, and they'll only be back at 9+pm.
SO, i was just wondering...the list of food that i want to eat right now...mmmmmm...:
1) Shiitake fried mushrooms
2) Baked fish rice with cheese
3) sharks finnnnn
4) grandma's soupppp
5) creamy clam chowder
6) salad prawns/ lobster with fruit salad
7) beef/seafood lasagne
8) calamari with tartar sauce and salsa cheese dip
9) bro's hamsters running in the cage-to be fried?
10) dad's angelfish in the tank-to be steamed?
holy cow...im just hungry. now, who says that to win a guy's heart, u have to present good food to him. nah, u can win mine too. bribing is included. :)
posted @ 9:21 AM
no princess
Im out of my mind. I've seen millions of gals calling themselves PRINCESS. it's not that i'm against them. Im just thinking that the word 'Princess' gives mi the impression of being pampered, of being petite and gentle, of being glittery, pink and all sorts. which is tooooo girlish for me to handle.
I'd rather be a rag gal than a princess. I'd rather play soccer and run about than wear a crown on ur head 24/7. I'd rather defy rules and play like there's no tml rather than abide rules, and wear DRESSES. drats. seriously, ppl calling themselves princess is irking me. it's not their fault aniway if they wanna live a life of luxury and comfort like a princess. it's just tt.. perhaps i dun think like they do. btw, i am starting to link ppl who think tt they are princesses with ppl who likes to sa jiao and act cute. prove me wrong. I will slap myself if i act cute one day. Im out of my mind.
I AM NO PRINCESS.
posted @ 7:23 AM
i will be away for the whole of next wk. from 30th may to 5th june. which means i won't be blogging. and meeting my big piggy. and irritating u guys. lol. saw the new famine camp shirts. it's all right i guess. still prefer last yr's tees. and pre u seminar is causing me not to go for remedials. drats. tt means i probably will miss out quite a bit.
Anw, i slept for more than 12 hrs today. all right. my eyes are going to rot. 12+hrs. i think living is secretive. talking is secretive. everything we do we are always cautious of wad we are talking, speaking and not to forget, ur actions speak too. it's hard to be really yourself nowadays. u have to live and abide the rules of the world. u live for ppl. dun u? crap bout freedom.
hey, guys, u get irritated and sianzzz by gals coz they think bout all sorts of crap and get jealous easily? tsk tsk. poor things. so tough to compromise with them i guess. so much for love. love=torture? hai. best fren has currently landed in a pot of shit. bless tt he gets through it asap with the gal. love=hurt for me? yes for me in the past. hell lot no for me now. pweetie monkey.
posted @ 4:08 AM
Angels and Demons
This xmas season's featuring 'The Chronicles of Narnia'!!! omg. bringing us back to live in the mythical era. ooommmg.
It's a real pity to say tt I do not hold enough cash. like the govt should really pump more HOT money into the economy so my mom will gimme more money to spend. Anw, 'Star Wars' definitely a movie i'll be catching. and um...like alot? haha. Watched episode 1 like ages ago. and can't remember episode 2. should do some catching up huh. gee. i need a story-teller. anione? :)
just wondering. Does gals really need funky bikinis to stay attractive? next. if u slp 12 hrs a day. will ur eyes rot? and next. can some firm come up with a plan tt hp can have unlimited smses? tt'll b way cool. hmmmmm...kinda questioning the unquestionable.
I want to steal my jc's clarinet hm. kindly allow me to do so. if there's ani violent behaviour subjected to fLy, you may be in great danger. so yea. just allow me to bring back hm. otherwise, i won't mind a new one for a gift! just know tt fLy belongs to the anti-yamaha clan. WAHAHA. dream on, fly. earn your own cash just in a few mths time. I just realised i can onli enjoy life when getting my 2nd pay coz i have to clear my 'debts'.
ok. im officially tired. and can collapse ani moment due to the 'sufficient' rest i had today when i slept at 1am. im awake for 17hrs alr. my life is to sleep. eyes rot. hell lot yea.
posted @ 1:52 PM
bargggghhh
I detest big-mouths. Accusers dun deserve my respect. Assumers too. Those who make mi feel like crap don't deserve ani of my respect. It's not as if i splurge money like waterfall. Plus, tt's for school stuff. u get it? school stuff. u wan mi to name it? AND, wad more a movie ticket? can't i just enjoy the mere entertainment of 10 bucks? So u wanna 'control' my 'splurging of money'? perhaps ur assumption of the 2 bucks purse tt i bought for myself? Coz i dun earn money, tt doesn't mean i can't spend money on what i think is right for me. I will graduate soon and i'll earn enuf money to show u wad i've got.
And, bro saw ck. so i assumed he told dad. and perhaps the whole family. tt im going home late again. and wow. so perhaps they are in silent objection? tt perhaps u dun approve of it? or do u? and i know tt u wan mi to concentrate on my studies. I know. I dun wanna raise this issue coz i know u will get mi frustrated and annoyed. And irritated due to the constant nagging i get whenever i go out. Like knowing limits and all. Peeps, not tt i detest it, but hey, how mani times do you wan to repeat it? like a million times b4 i grow up? If ani of you would have cared to listen to me, i would just have talked to you guys bout this matter. But you dun. And u dun becoz i tried talking to dad and mom today bout why roy is against me. And u guys continue laughing and appreciate the ENTERTAINMENT you've got with the tv programme. how ironic. So u guys dun listen, assume, 'interrogate' me, 'spy' on me, gossip behind my back abt what i shouldn't do, give mi weird looks tt i think i dun deserve, and expect mi to talk to u guys? ha. a prisoner indeed. and perhaps, after all these, u guys will nag and say it's all gd for u? and tt i try to look pathetic. and tt i should really learn to grow up? I think we should look at ourselves. If more understanding and listening is there for me, would i have even wrote down the no. of 'perhaps'? note the assumptions i made becoz of the communication breakdown.
Perhaps WE should really look at the real definition of family. The brighter side of definition of family to me now is just a place for u to slp, to watch tv, to eat, to do hw, and have a com to blog and chat with. perhaps i should rent a hse and i get all these too? and mayb new frens to meet with? Ah huh. peeps, i think u taught mi the wrong definition. rewind pls. ur actions show what i deserve. and indirectly, wad u deserve.
posted @ 6:18 AM
whoa la
im back. firstly to tell u i can oh-for-gdness-sake flunk my 9233 test. full of rubbish.
Anw, back to life again. the routine of complaining the one-stop humid weather and then the next-stop freaking freezing brrr weather.
I feel that SYF has been a really really worthy and enriching experience. It was the final lap, as i said. And S.C.H WAS OUR performing stage. wonderfully gd. Results were not up to our expectation but i guess the process means so much more than anithing else. How we bonded as one despite the gruelling practises and our blardee dreaded eye bags, I believe every NY band member found it really worth practising so hard. *Claps* Now, the experience and process means SOOO much more than words. I just can't describe it. I guess Band brought me to a higher level of maturity. I guess Band thought me how much undying passion music lovers have for music. It's really worth everything. It's not the SYF, it's not the competition. I guess u just have to feel it for urself. It's the 1st time when i thought that competition was nothing but a word. Values should be the process. I guess it's all bout feelings. U feel for people, and then u feel for music. Or vice versa. it's all the same. Band brought me to greater level of assurance tt i am just in love with the depth of music. Band has made mi gone so crazy tt i m thinking of SPLURGING money for wad else but CLARINET! maybe grades? and cello...but now, piano comes first. hmmm. the yearn to earn money drives fly. soon huh. fly's gonna earn gold bars real soon.
Ah HUH. yep. and i feel like going for plastic surgery now coz i think tt my face looks like crap. hmmmm. distorted. LOL. But, no matter what, even the ugliest person or the scum of the earth is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L. Dun u agree? We are ALL BEAUTIFUL in a way or another. Reminds mi of Christina Aguilera's MTV 'Beautiful'. makes sense.
All right. fLy gonna slack for the day. coz i find it ridiculous tt i spent time studying and wrote such crap on my paper. it's anti-school day. So much for the 'happiness' that after i screwed up my 9233, i got such a 'delighted' news that i'll be attending College Day, which falls on this Sat right after my pre-u seminar briefing at JJC, which means I have to go back to sch after settling my butt down at JJC where i could have gone shopping or head back hm to sleep after tt.
Reporting time: 7.15am at sch fountain. Head to JJC by chartered bus. Full uni.
Briefing ends at 12.30pm. then fly back to sch. have quick lunch.
Reporting time at NY: 2.45pm.
Falling out time (end of college day): 5+pm.
sigh. It looks worse than a working day.
posted @ 10:50 AM
Final destination
Play our hearts out. Now we set the standard of ONE sound, we continue setting the standard of ONE phrasing, of ONE feeling. Final destination is reaching. Really soon. Shut your ears when you hear others play. WE are the ones who judge for our own playing. No shivers. The sudden rush of feelings, of tears, of hair standing up. NY Band will leave you astounded. NY Band will teach you how to FEEL. We will teach you what have become of us. You will hear of our journey. You will hear for yourself what we are made of. We will rise. Be prepared.
posted @ 11:16 AM
like u've never...
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like no one's watching.
Sing like no one's listening.
PERFORM like NO ONE'S WATCHING AND LISTENING.
Live like it's heaven on earth.
I'm a performer! You are too! ENJOY our performance! Looking forward to 5th may. we're gonna sting. BEWARE.
posted @ 4:05 AM
Phew. Sure is going to be tough.
FIRST UP...
THE BADS:
Im hot-headed. Very easily hot-tempered. BAD BAD BAD.
Im as stubborn as a mule.
I dislike tummy. u know? fats? tummy? ugh.
I particularly moan and groan and roar and scream at ppl who lie to me.
I got a weak heart.
I think i got high blood pressure. Did I mention I get stressed up over the slightest stuff?
OH OH OH. I procrastinate ppl who don't respect me. U really need to take a good look at yourself.
My eyes can pop out. BEWARE.
I think I love bitching.
I eat irregularly. Tat explains me not growing up.
Oh yes. One more. I wake up when the sun sets. COOL HOR.
NOW FOR THE GOODS! YIPPEE!
hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
I love socialising. alot alot!
I want to become a model of my own world. YAYA. DREAM ON.
I love those who love me. Embrace, cherish and all nicey stuff! *HUGSSSS*
Ah. Yes. I love colouring my toe nails, buying chunky earrings & being pretty though i dun think im worth it.
I LOVE PARADOXES OF LIFE. I LURVE, LURRRVEEEE, LURRRRRRRVVVVEEEEEEEE THEM.
FOR GDNESS SAKE, DUN CLASSIFY ME AS 'CY LOVES TO BE A PRINCESS!' YUCKS. MY TERM: RAGDOLL. ugly and tattered. damn cool.
I can go on forever. I'll just stop here. Know more bout me thru my entries! *wriggles my nose*